The YCBT Services Blog

To see one in all and all in one is to break through the great barrier which narrows one's perception of reality. - Thich Naht Hanh.

While the idea of introducing yourself to someone new is a very common challenge for those who struggle with social anxiety, for many the greater and often overlooked pain comes from difficulty deepening relationships to a more meaningful level. Many clients I have had the honor of working with have reported making some progress with initiating contact with others or social activities, though get stuck with how to maintain and broaden these connections over time. Perhaps you're not sure what the "right" step is to take at a certain point in time, or you find yourself having worrisome thoughts that your gesture won't be welcomed, or it will be received as a burden. Here I will describe some of the most common stuck points I have observed in individuals with social anxiety struggling to deepen relationships, with some helpful directions on how to break through them and keep those connections building.

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) interventions are often geared towards targeting the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that are perpetuating this overly active avoidance system. CBT skills are focused on developing more helpful and balanced perspectives of oneself and social interactions, while learning and practicing approaching one's feared and avoided social situations over time.

One of the most insidious and painful aspects of social anxiety many of my clients describe is the feeling of being alone, disconnected, and different from others. These feelings, and the perceptions and beliefs associated with them, can both contribute to and be the result of high levels of distress and suffering in social situations.

Experiencing social anxiety in the midst of managing a chronic health condition can pose many challenges, particularly regarding developing and maintaining a strong social support system.

Feelings of doubt and insecurity regarding one's sense of belonging, acceptability and freedom to know and be known by others are often core features underlying social anxiety. These feelings and beliefs give rise to apprehension and worry regarding being judged negatively by others, and can unintentionally lead to unhelpful habits of coping such as avoiding situations, perfectionism, or people-pleasing.

One of the most common social anxiety concerns is the fear that one will appear anxious to others: being anxious about your social anxiety itself! Of course, it's not just that some sign of one's anxiety will be visible, but that it will be followed by some form of negative evaluation or judgment that can greatly exacerbate the distress experienced in a social situation.

As of 2019, 33 states and the District of Columbia have passed laws legalizing marijuana in some form. 11 of those have laws legalizing marijuana for recreational use, in addition to the country of Canada.

Dr. Yeilding presents a three-part self-help video series with the National Social Anxiety Center on learning how to overcome social anxiety by using a common CBT technique called behavioral experiments.